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You Were Never Really Free

by Pink Lady

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1.
Blonde 03:35
I'm slowly losing my friends I should be bothered But losing people like them makes me feel stronger You treat me good when you're gone I remember she's blonde My mind should be more freed up And somewhat empty Don't need more space for myself cuss I've got plenty You treat me good when you're gone I remember she's blonde It's not like this was easy It's not like I'm asking you to go It's not like you'd believe me It's not like it's my fault you don't know When worrying bout what'll come It's hardest waiting I'm sick of "finding myself" Sick of debating There's nowhere left you can run I'm already done I'm already done I've been used and thrown around I'm probably fine now It's hard to know this for sure But I know somehow And some way I'll be ok And that days today Ya that days today I broke your heart Thursday you'll probably just forget it by Wednesday And on that Friday night, I know you'll try and hide And say that you're alright I really hope your not I'm slowly losing my friend That's all she is now It's hard to know it for sure But I know somehow And someway I'll be ok But that's not today That days not today I wish when I said I'm fine it was it tired And didn't make you believe that in a liar There's someone I'd like to blame But she's not the same And somewhere she changed
2.
I wish I didn't sweat in public places Wish I felt good in empty spaces Because between my fear of being here And being left behind I'm inadequate I'm way too delicate I've got an ego made of sand Cuss the part of me that needs to breathe Is the part that should “be a man” This world of hypocrites People all made of plastic Everybody wants themselves More than they want someone else These plastic people around me They act like the found me Like I wanna be here This doubt that I have is sinking Like "what are they thinking, and is it about me ?" I wish that I could trust somebody new I wish I could forget that I've been used I wish every little part of me Was right where I thought it outta be There's nothing wrong with me Nothing more for you to see Nothing That I’d like to show Nowhere that I’d like to go Their eyes are well defined When they're staring into mine Telling me about my soul Like there's something I should know And something should be said for those who can't go to be Cuss the honest ones in life Often cannot close their eyes I wish I lived in a different world One where I never met this girl One where I gave up this part of me To someone who really wanted me This world of hypocrites People all made of plastic Everybody wants themselves More than they want someone else And I wish that I could leave Wish that I could pack my things Cuss I’d rather be alone Than be stuck sharing a home with you
3.
Deadcrush 04:11
Stop for a sec Someone's making promises they haven't kept And someone's acting free because I haven't slept And I'm still a mess I wish I didn't feel anything Stop and breathe Begging for some space Don't look at me Answers to my questions that I cant see And I can't read wish I didn't feel anything She's changing me I'm the same old me Not sure where I was don't where to be She's changing me Who says I'm free? When I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place I just pretend like I'm not there It doesn't help the situation just helps to not feel so scared Cuss I'm not too good at finding "it" "It" being, promises I've broke Past, future, and present Not sure what the premise is But kick me off the premises Not good at expressing this And not sure if my money's fixed Constantly I'm questioning everything I ever did Constantly I underbid on all those broken promises Cuss most of my emotions are tethered to better weather When I'm feeling fine I'm feeling great There's nothing to love when there's no one to hate And I won't admit defeat Or say it's not meant to be But the second we felt the same is the second you had to leave Every now and then I sit and ponder What standing still would cause and if I could have made me stronger All I know is that I couldn't take it any longer Your not my love you're just a crush Someone that's dead to me inside and out No longer someone that I care about Or someone that I have to learn how to live without Cuss it's hard to admit defeat And says it's not meant to be But the second we felt the same Is the second you had to leave
4.
Breaking my back And grinding my teeth And holding my breath And losing my sleep Standing up slow Caught in my ways The hardest part is feeling the same The fact that the past is all that we had Makes me glad I’m intact and now I'm not attached Say that it's all my fault Get real mad and avoid my calls Say it's not true and I might be wrong When I'm not wrong No, I'm not wrong Change your philosophy Turn that yes into a maybe Then you get a little problem, blow it and say thatI'm just soft You make me nervous You do it on purpose You make me feel like I'm going insane You try to change me Manipulate me Putting your name where it doesn't belong The problem child still stuck running Avoiding all her problems it's not that stunning All these people mad that somethings wrong and I don't talk too much If something was really wrong you would just say Shhhh
5.
The floor felt cold and their eyes felt beedie And time moved slow as they all felt needy I wanted to impress with the memories recited But the wrong ones showed and we all became divided and sad If I had the chance I'd burn all heaven down Watch as angels fly away Feathers adding to the flames I wouldn't be the first And wouldn't be the last Break the arms of clocks so I couldn't watch the time pass Loving every second And loving every hour The tastes in our mouths would start to taste sour With our mission complete we'd all feel the same Then we'd feel abandon and we're the ones to blame If I ever gave you all the feeling that you're getting more That's on me but I'm not sorry I don't wanna be what everybody needs And everybody sees Before they go to sleep The feelings not right But it'll stay the same Cuss you don't have sight And I don't wanna change I doubt we would care if he made is presence known My king left his kingdom cuss he'd rather be alone “That creation chooses me tho I left you to be Praising me for miracles that I could not conceive And with the lives that you take and the hate that you all breed My love was never earned and you were never really free I made the beginning just to see how you would end Your promising a change Is just playing pretend And as that dust settled we both silently agreed I'm not the savior you want Your not the children I need”
6.
I wish I didn't sweat in public places Wish I felt good in empty spaces Because between my fear of being here And being left behind I'm inadequate I'm way too delicate I've got an ego made of sand Cuss the part of me that needs to breathe Is the part that should “be a man” This world of hypocrites People all made of plastic Everybody wants themselves More than they want someone else These plastic people around me They act like the found me Like I wanna be here This doubt that I have is sinking Like "what are they thinking, and is it about me ?" I wish that I could trust somebody new I wish I could forget that I've been used I wish every little part of me Was right where I thought it outta be There's nothing wrong with me Nothing more for you to see Nothing That I’d like to show Nowhere that I’d like to go Their eyes are well defined When they're staring into mine Telling me about my soul Like there's something I should know And something should be said for those who can't go to be Cuss the honest ones in life Often cannot close their eyes I wish I lived in a different world One where I never met this girl One where I gave up this part of me To someone who really wanted me This world of hypocrites People all made of plastic Everybody wants themselves More than they want someone else And I wish that I could leave Wish that I could pack my things Cuss I’d rather be alone Than be stuck sharing a home with you

credits

released October 5, 2020

All songs were written, performed, produced, and mixed by Danny Scott

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Pink Lady Denver, Colorado

Colorado Indie Pop/Rock Project

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